


Health and Safety (Winchester Edition)

by Yalu



Series: spn_verse challenges [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crack, Documentation, Gen, Men of Letters Headquarters, epistolary (sort of), notices, signs - Freeform, tagging
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-12
Updated: 2013-07-12
Packaged: 2017-12-19 06:17:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/880416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yalu/pseuds/Yalu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>or, notices in the Men of Letters' bunker that got defaced within six months of the boys moving in. </p><p>Cracky.</p><p>Inspired by an idea by 1337nik and a title by Trojie - written for a challenge at <a href="http://spn-verse.livejournal.com/">spn_verse</a>.<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	Health and Safety (Winchester Edition)

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry, 1337nik, I didn't stick very close to your original prompt (tried, didn't work out). Should be in the same spirit though!

  


In the kitchen: 

Guests and residents please note  
For Safety and Comfort

1\. Food is not to be left unattended. Please cover or store all ingredients and leftovers appropriately.

2\. All spills are to be cleaned up immediately.

3\. Dishes are to be piled neatly beside the sink for cleaning.  
 _Not all in one pile, Cas_  
 _I understand now, Dean. I am sorry about your favourite cup._

4\. Salt can be found in the pantry to the right of this notice. In case of emergency, 5lb bags are in the cupboard beside the door. Rock salt can be found in the armory. It is not to be used for consumption.

5\. Knives used for hunting or spellcasting are not to be mixed with the dining silverware.

 

 

On the door to Room #3A:

Spellcasting Workroom  
INGREDIENTS ARE NOT TO BE REMOVED  
Volatile ingredients such as dragon tears must remain in close proximity to counteragents and antidotes.  
Initiates and Men below level four must not work unsupervised.

Below, on a piece of paper:

_KEEP OUT_

_until ~~we figure out which ones are dangerous~~ Cas okays everything for safety_

_I give my "okay"._

 

 

On the wall of the shower room:

NOTICE

1\. NO RUNNING. Tiles are slippery when wet.

2\. Priority is to be given to spellworkers exposed to spills or failed experiments, visitors, and those returning from long journeys.

3\. Stalls 8-10 are reserved for decontamination of dangerous substances such as dragon tears, vampire blood, wraith venom & etc  
 _\+ hellhound blood. 3 showers at least. You still stink, Sammy._

4\. WARNING - Spellworkers: If you have been in contact with sphinx fur DO NOT USE SHOWERS.  
Oil and dry cleansers can be found in Isolation Room #1 (first door to the left)  
 _Why'd you think they can't shower?_  
 _The hair would ignite and destroy most of northern Kansas. The last time an initiate made that error was at Krakatoa in 1883._  
 _Since when do you shower, Cas?_

5\. Care is to be taken when washing with holy water - rosary beads clog the drains.

6\. Men of Letters are expected to ration their hygiene products wisely. Additional soap is available from the quartermaster only if necessary.

7\. All Men of Letters are expected to conduct themselves in a gentlemanly fashion. This includes:  
\- No pushing  
\- No throwing  
 _\- No Nair._  
 _Why's that, baldy?_  
 _Not funny, Dean. I barely noticed it in time._  
 _You've got too much hair anyway_

_#8 Cas if you're reading this, remember to wash shampoo OUT of your hair this time_

 

 

On the door to a file room:

Men of Letters and guests are respectfully requested not to bring meals or beverages into the file storage room.

  
_Beers count, Dean._  
 _Need the vitamins, Sammy_  
 _The nutritional value of beer is quite low. There are no useful vitamins present._  
 _Since when are you a tagger anyway, Cas?_

  



End file.
